Category Archives: Japan - Page 3

Suddenly, Ramen – Part Deux

Posted by on April 18, 2011 No comments

The world of ramen should be a nice place, so in order to make up for lashing out last time I’ll focus this post on praising a couple of my favourite noodly entrepots. Well, only one, really.

Muteppou was an incredible find. I stumbled upon it during my not-so-short exile in Osaka. Not physically, though, I found it on Google Maps, which isn’t quite as romantic. Yet little did that change the ultimate outcome of my first visit, which led me to falling in love with the place. After initially locating the venue, I moseyed there only to find a queue of people standing in the street for no apparent reason. I walked past a few times looking like an idiot just to make sure they were doing the exact thing I was frightened of, queuing for my noodles. That was not a euphemism, by the way. I was more curious than hungry at the time so I queued for half an hour and eventually enjoyed slurping the best noodles in my life so far. I left the premises stuffed, burpy and wondering if I would ever feel like going there again. Then I repeated the procedure on the following day. And the day after that.

かため、こってり、ねぎおおめ

My visits to the Muteppou in Osaka were all quite interesting. At the time I had just began getting over my flu, and therefore my nose was slightly less clogged up each day, leading me to gradually get a better taste every visit before eventually going back to Tokyo.

It’s also quite ridiculous that there is exactly one Muteppou in Osaka and one in Tokyo. The one in Osaka was next to my hotel in Nipponbashi, and the one in Tokyo is on the way home from work, in Egota. These cities can’t really be classified as the smallest in the world, either. It’s like winning the tonkotsu-lottery. Twice. I know if something like that did exist, I’d be the first – and probably only – one to participate.

Muteppou offers a tonkotsu broth that is, for lack of a better word, rich. This is partly explained by the restaurant using 300 kilograms of meaty pork bones for broth each day. As you sit at the counter you can observe the huge vats of raw pork bones in their kitchen for kicks. The result of this grotesque amount of bones is that the broth at Muteppou is so thick and rich that it’s far closer to gravy in consistency than to standard ramen broth. And this is not an exaggeration but an objective observation.

The stores function in exactly the same way in both locations. There is a vending machine at the entrance for picking the desired meal. Once you have ticket in hand to submit for your favorite noodle feast you will be asked a question in three parts. The inquiry goes “how would you like it?” and refers to the chewyness of the noodles (katame = al dente / normal / yawarakame = overcooked), the richness of the broth (kotteri = rich / normal / assari = bland) and the amount of spring onions you want thrown in. Because apparently the broth isn’t meaty and greasy enough as is, they also throw some pork back fat on the top for good measure. Exquisite. I’ve found heaven, too bad there’s a queue.

Close-up of spring onions and fat at Egota. Actual noodles are well hidden underneath

My personal favorite and coincidentally the only one I’ve ever tried, the chashuu tonkotsu ramen, costs ¥900 in Osaka and ¥1000 in Tokyo. It includes a large bowl of  meaty pork bone broth, around 12 slices of chashuu (they count them, not me) and a normal serving of noodles. Kaedama (extra serving of noodles) cost ¥100 per serving, or ¥150 with some added chashuu. The taste is exactly the same at both shops, and the advantage of Tokyo is that until now I have not yet encountered a real queue.

In addition, one of the ten-ins at Egota is slightly too enthusiastic and wants to make sure that the gaijin curiosity fully enjoys his meal. He repeats the performance with every customer to some extent, but he actually follows me out in the street every time to ask for feedback on how the broth tasted on that specific visit. I guess the remote location doesn’t really attract foreigners, especially in this day and time. He also seemed quite impressed at my limited knowledge in famous tonkotsu ramen shops as well as flattered by my repetitive praise of their noodles. It would be more difficult for me not to praise them. It is by far the best noodle broth combination I have eaten anywhere. The shop clerk actually asked me if I’m not beginning to get tired of the taste. I retorted that two visits a week is perfect. I can hardly wait for tomorrow.

Ramen.

-Antti

Japan and Finland, Worlds Apart

Posted by on April 15, 2011 3 comments

The title is not a reference to the British boyband of the 90s, just to be clear.

I had long wanted to rant a bit about language education in Japan, and the Japan Blog Matsuri provided me with a great excuse to do that. I’m not a native English speaker myself, and although I’ve been bombarded by foreign languages from a very young age, I can still somewhat relate to the difficulties the Japanese encounter when learning English, currently their most important foreign language.



There is a pretty stark contrast to language education and learning between Japan and Finland. Although Japan employs a variety of native English speakers as teachers, some of which operate on very different bases, the system as a whole, from what I’ve seen, is still in a lamentable state. I spent one academic year at the Kansai Gaidai University in Osaka studying Japanese. That’s not the point here, though. One local I befriended at the time told me that Kansai Gaidai was a great school for foreigners, much less so for the Japanese. Judging from the results, this statement proved very true.

A large amount of the Japanese graduating from Gaidai work hard for the purpose of becoming English teachers for Japanese kids. The university also boasts the highest amount of foreign student throughout Japan, somewhere around 500 people during an academic year, whilst also encouraging intercultural and interlinguistic interaction very vividly. Most of the students keen on becoming teachers had spent at least a year abroad in an English speaking country and had been studying the language since primary school.

Open Campus Day at Gaidai, Finnish Booth

Despite all this, the Japanese students graduating from Gaidai with a level of English sufficient for speaking properly, let alone teaching it, were about as numerous as my posts which omit the word fuck. Written grammar was flawed, spoken output stuttering and lacked in confidence. I won’t even go into the puronanshieeshon part. Clearly the problem is deep, and very topical; some international firms such as Rakuten are already moving towards making English the company’s official language by the end of 2012.

In Europe, language education, at least in schools I have frequented, has been performed by extremely competent people. This not only means that they don’t make shameful grammatical mistakes, but also that they possess a natural native English accent (often Oxford or General American English). It would seem logical that hearing the right sounds would make it easier for kids to reproduce the right sounds. Furthermore, speaking up and having conversations are both encouraged in Finnish schools from a young age.

In Japan, the standard persists that homeroom teachers are responsible for teaching English at the primary school level. Arguably, this would be the most important time for Japanese children to develop an affinity for speaking a foreign language correctly. The homeroom teachers themselves have admitted to not being confident in their English teaching and feeling burdened by the task to an extent where they would rather see someone specialized take care of it.

Suddenly, Engrish! (Okinawa, March 2009)

Considering Japan has an incredible amount of private English schools and English conversation schools aimed at all ages populated by native speakers as teachers, I find it weird that standard schools are not able to recruit that kind of specific talent. There is a huge supply of inexperienced native English teachers willing to come to Japan to perform the tasks that homeroom teachers would prefer to avoid, as shown by the pool of people that get cut from the JET programme every year. Due to current teachers being incompetent, they do not have the necessary tools to engage the children in interactive learning, and the revolutionary system of “repeat after me with the same horrendous accent” is a common and favored approach.

Naturally, the completely differing writing system adds a handicap that is not possible for me to entirely fathom. Yet, I do see the need to diminish or completely remove katakana-based phonetics from the English teaching system at a relatively early phase. One highly learned Gaidai student whom I talked to a few years ago admitted to reading the katakana versions of songs when singing English karaoke. Et tu, Brute? A 20-year-old English major? I fell into a coma at that moment. How are students ever supposed to learn proper pronunciation if they keep on using a writing system that is suited for English output about as much as a gaijin is suited to become a Shinto priest.

Japan faces a great challenge in trying to upgrade the general English proficiency of the workforce at the rate that international markets and local companies require. One thing is certain, though. Adult education and English conversation cafes are not the answer in the long run. Something has to be done about the way children are educated.

-Antti

P.S. Thanks for hosting the April 2011 Japan Blog Matsuri go to NihongoUp

A Night at the Embassy

Posted by on April 9, 2011 No comments

The Finnish Embassy in Tokyo organized a small event on the 9th of April to allow for Finnish citizens to get together and discuss the sphere of confusion in which Japan has been engulfed during the past month. By being in attendance, I was reminded of quite a few details I had managed to forget as well as able to get access to some novel data.

The event can be divided into three subjects and speakers:

-Finnish Ambassador Jari Gustafsson talked about general risks, communication, traveling, living in Tokyo and explained some of the mechanisms behind the decisions that the embassy had taken in the most hectic weeks after the main quake of March 11.

-Heikki Mäkipää, Head of the Finnish Institute in Tokyo, tapped into his knowledge in geology to give us in-depth information on the current situation concerning possible aftershocks, geological causes for the earthquake and where to turn to for further information.

-The Head of Tekes Japan, Reijo Munther, an engineer with a strong background in nuclear reactors (and cooling systems thereof), shared his views on the Fukushima plant, the imminent dangers it represents as well as put general radiation levels in a Finnish context.

Concerning the media

The ambassador was quick to point out that which has been repeated over and over on the internet for weeks, yet it was still nice to hear it from an official source:  the Japanese are more used to handling earthquake situations and have reacted to the situation very calmly, as opposed to foreign countries who… well… haven’t. In Finland in particular, where earthquakes never reach a magnitude a human being could perceive, merely the mention of an earthquake throws news outlets into scandal-seeking mode. A couple of questions directed at the ambassador today concerned the farce of Finns hoarding iodine pills and the notion that small local newspapers in Viitasaari supposedly knew more about the embassy’s crisis plans than the embassy itself.

Mr. Gustafsson had been in Finland when the quake first struck, and spent the whole day answering different media about the event. He had firsthand experience on how every medium that day was striving to discover the one word that would allow them to publish the most fear mongering story available. On the same morning, one expert source had inadvertently blurted out the term China Syndrome, which had soon been taken out of context and diffused everywhere by overly zealous news outlets who should be washed down the sink and shit-listed.

Concerning communications and traveling

The Finnish Embassy is still discouraging non-essential travel to the Tokyo area, but these limitations are likely to loosen within the following weeks or months.

When all else fails, obsolete technology is here to the rescue.

In the context of mobile phone networks, March 11 indicated that the loss of a mere 10% of network capacity renders mobile phone calls useless in the case of a disaster. If a strong aftershock were to strike Tokyo, this would certainly happen. As experienced during the main earthquake, however, mobile data was still widely available and for example Skype calls via mobile phones worked normally. Similarly, although normal home phone lines experienced issues and were sometimes cut, public phones were devoid of complications, leading to a suggestion for everyone to arm themselves with phone cards.

Finnair remains one of the very few European airlines offering direct flights to Narita airport without the need for crew changes. This means that 3 daily flights from Japan (Tokyo, Nagoya, Osaka) to Helsinki are constantly rolling, so were the living conditions in Japan to take a turn for the worst, a way out would most likely remain available.

Concerning aftershocks (Kuaket pois!)

The danger and risks evoked by aftershocks were something I hadn’t properly grasped until now. The area affected by the shocks has been constantly reviewed as the epicenters of new aftershocks spread and now covers an area 600kms long practically covering all of Honshu. This means that devastating aftershocks are a possibility anywhere from Tokyo to Hokkaido. A possibility, not an eventuality.

Can you hear the cry of the planet?

Mr. Mäkipää introduced two scenarios prepared by international seismology experts; these scenarios were labeled the hopeful scenario and the negative scenario. In the first scenario, strong aftershocks come to a relatively quick end (obviously this scenario took a huge blow with the 7,1 magnitude aftershock on the 7th of April) and the situation soon calms down as the accumulated pressure in the lithosphere subsides.

The negative scenario concerned the possibility of a significant aftershock with a magnitude above 7, which in the worst-case scenario could hit directly south of the Tokyo area, causing massive damage. Regardless of location, a strong aftershock would definitely cause new problems to the already damaged infrastructure and dangerously stretched rescue and sheltering resources of Eastern Japan. Although there is a possibility for an occurrence of this nature, the probability was not discussed beyond the perspective that it will diminish with time. General guidelines urged us to keep this in mind until summer, asking for increased awareness and vigilance in the near future. While there is no imminent danger, the situation is by no means over.

Concerning radiation

Mr. Munther had a very relaxed approach towards all of the radiation concerns that have been presented up until now. He maintained that the major radiation risk still only concerns a very limited area near the damaged Fukushima Dai-ichi reactors while also admitting that no real breakthrough in cooling the reactors had been reached during the past 3 weeks. At the same time, the personnel working on repairing the plant is growing tired, which causes some concern.

He also admitted that until the Great Eastern Japan Earthquake he had been under the belief that the 7 meter-high anti-tsunami wall as well as having the emergency cooling pumps 20 meters above sea level would combine to be an adequate level of precaution at the Fukushima plant. History proved otherwise. The plant is now essentially future scrap metal, but precarious cooling and repairing efforts will need to go on for months, if not years.

Looks pretty good right now

Concerning the tap water scare in Tokyo at the moment, he made a couple of interesting comparisons. First of all, the limits for water radiation levels in Japan are really low compared to European standards. The limit for drinking water is 300 becquerels/kg in Japan while it is set far higher in Finland at 500 becquerels/kg. He demonstrated the disparity by stating that water from drill wells in Finland often reaches as high as 460 becquerels/kg. According to this analysis, when tap water in Tokyo exceeded 100 becquerels/kg (Japanese limit judged safe for children to drink) a couple of weeks back, it would have remained “very good drinking water.”

There is still good reason to keep a reasonable amount of water reserves at home, not due to radiation, but potential aftershocks. Mr. Mäkipää emphasized that in the event of a strong aftershock, it is crucial to stop drinking tap water immediately until a damage assessment has been made. This is due to the possibility of pipes breaking and sewage mixing with drinking water.

As an interesting anecdote, the scarcity of bottled water in Eastern Japan is reportedly not only related to the lack of water itself. One important bottle cap factory in Sendai was destroyed in the original quake, leading to a 30% loss of capacity in the entire Japanese bottle cap industry.

All of the statements in the post (with the exception of my media bashing) are direct translations of comments provided by Finnish government officials, although in a more relaxed, informal environment. I have no reason to doubt the veracity of any of the above.

-Antti

Suddenly, Ramen – Part I

Posted by on April 8, 2011 No comments

I began compiling this post originally in mid-February, but never managed to properly finish it before something quite unexpected happened. This led to other things triumphing over the enjoyability of swallowing  wheat flour in different forms as a writing topic. By now I’ve managed to lengthen the original ramen compendium so much that offering it as one wall of text would be nothing short of disrespectful towards the readers.

This first post will concern the disappointments I’ve experienced when visiting a couple of the most highly touted noodle shops on the web. The shops weren’t on the web though, only the touting.

Ramen Jiro　ラーメン二郎

Ramen Jiro, originally located next to Keio University in Tokyo, is an institution. It’s a place that I have planned visiting since I first began preparing a trip to Japan circa 2004, and if I opened, the ancient notepad file would still say something along the lines of “Jiro: Epic ramen place, gotta visit.” Right. Instead, 7 years later, it crushed my dreams. I’ll admit that I didn’t go to the original ramen shop in Mita yet, something I’ll have to do in order to confirm my doubts about the franchise and reach the ultimate status of food critic critic.

The one and only Ramen Jiro Mita Honten

My point is, that each and every ramen connoisseur (I hate writing that word because it feels wrong) whose report I have read so far have blogged about the Jiro experience as some kind of holy grail. In addition to fully explaining the eating procedures and acting like the go-to besserwissers in the field of gaijin ramen eating, they have without exception emphasized two things that I cannot agree on in a million years:

-The serving is huge and eating it is a challenge -> take it slow -> it’s like a marathon -> you might die

-The experience is beyond precedent -> best ramen ever -> worth the half hour + queue,  etc.

The bear is right. Listen to the bear.

二郎池袋

I will hereby debunk these exaggerations accordingly, starting with size. On my first trip, I went to Ramen Jiro Ikebukuro, hungry enough to eat a side of cow. I was starving at that point, and while the queue at the Ikebukuro shop was manageable, I still had to wait about 20 minutes before being able to enter the premises. That made me both angry and frustrated, leading me to contemplate ordering the 大 (large) serving, which, according to different sources, would be retarded. I was losing confidence in the normal size being able to satisfy my hunger but eventually put my trust in random internet writers and decided the standard size would probably be large enough.

Although I did order it with W 豚, or double pork, arguably the only positive aspect of the evening. Double pork, for the only time in Japanese history, adhered to the idea that there was actually meat in the food. I would estimate a good couple hundred grams of pork meat. No chashuu, just plain, boring, non-fat pork. I’d rather have fat than pork in there but actually being able to experience eating meat, as opposed to just being teased by the idea of seeing five grams of meat in the bowl, was a novel experience in a ramen shop. I also ordered the にんいくましまし (extra extra garlic) which basically meant that people in the same car on the train were not going to be very happy that night. Or the next morning.

Picture shamelessly stolen off a Japanese site until I can find mine

When I finally received the bowl, it became apparent that the serving was large for ramen shop standards, but calling it a challenge is a travesty; it’s an offense to ramen as food, to challenges as a concept and to me as a binge eater. I rolled my sleeves up, dug in and about 15 minutes later the bowl was on the counter, the table wiped clean and a tall gaijin sneaked out of the door full, but disappointed. I understand that the bowl might be tough to finish for a Japanese high school girl, but if eating is such an ordeal for self-proclaimed “ramen lovers” , I can only suggest for them to avoid Jiro altogether. Or eating, for that matter.

Off to the second point, taste. Boring. Just. Really. Boring. The broth was not up to par with some other とんこつ pork bone broths I’ve had, the garlic made everything taste like garlic, which was not necessarily bad, the pork was non-fat and bland and the noodles simply too thick to taste like anything. I knew beforehand that the thickness of the noodles could prove to be my demise as I don’t really get the point of udon or other tasteless wheat products.

The entire experience could best be summed up as nothing special.

二郎三田本店

Because of the elongated timeline during which this blog post has been written and in contrary to a paragraph further up, I did manage to go to Jiro Honten in Mita later on. さすが三田本店, it was slightly better than Ikebukuro. I once again ordered the double pork version but this time only a regular amount of garlic and あぶらましまし (extra extra fat) instead. I know the general expectations of Jiro shops never circle around cleanliness or hygiene, but I still failed to appreciate the fact that my bowl was overflowing with broth and fat in such a ludicrous way that my hands were dripping once I had moved the bowl down from the counter and to the table. They could probably use larger bowls.

The broth was tastier at Honten, which could be partly caused by the extra fat I ordered, the やさい (vegetable topping) did not only consist of sprouts but also included cabbage, and the pork was really fatty and tastier in general. Compiled thoughts about the Honten: The price is right and the food is enjoyable, but most of the hype is unnecessary and the 40 minute queue is hardly worth it more than once. The previous review still stands.

Tukumo

Another interesting and supposedly unique ramen experience was Tukumo in Ebisu, a ramen store renowned for their cheese ramen. Allow me to explain the premise: Cheese is my muse. Cheese is what keeps me happy in this world. Also, the left side of my brain is cheese, though the doctor may have made that one up. I made the doctor up. Lost my train of thought there, back to the story.

Anyway, in Japan, cheese is a rare commodity and by consequence, I’m constantly suffering from cheese busoku. I was delighted when I heard that there is a place bold enough to combine cheese and noodles into some kind of master dish that can shatter palates and destroy the minds of the weak. Imagine my disappointment when the cheese was only there for show and the miso-based broth tasted like nothing. The extra toppings (chashuu and aji tamago) did their best to compensate for flavor but were quite overpriced. For those who absolutely want cheese in their ramen, it’s either Tukumo or DIY, though.

Cheese? In my Ramen? It's more likely than you think!

While the above reviews may seem harsh and an unnecessary attack on two renowned ramen shops, I can assure that they are still both worth visiting, if only once. They merely do not live up to the hype in my books. And because the hype, especially concerning Jiro, goes to preposterous heights, I had to exaggerate accordingly the other way. Some internationally less known and better alternatives will be presented in Part II.

Ramen.

-Antti

Medium Tank

Posted by on April 4, 2011 2 comments

As I was rummaging through Japanese news trends at work today, I came across a couple of interesting articles concerning the consequences of the Great Tohoku Earthquake and reports thereof. Again. Indeed, time is not yet ripe for me to post a wall of text about ramen, so I’ll rather use this post to provide some food for thought to outside observers.

I accidentally stumbled upon Gakuranman who had, to a large extent, published what I have been thinking and repeating to nearly everyone during the past three weeks:

“…The foreign press was scrambling for anything they could get, plastering the headlines with emotive words and shocking pictures. Fear mongering over the possibility of a repeat Chernobyl was rife as well as doomsaying about nuclear fallout over Tokyo, 200km south of the affected area. Misinformation about the units used to measure radiation levels began to spread, quickly overshadowing the plight of the people in the stricken areas of northern Japan. Even previously respectable newspapers seemed to be gripped by sensationalism and unable to report the basic facts needed to keep people free from worry. Many expats living in Tokyo and other areas left the country or moved further south due to pressure from relatives and embassies.

Something amazing was happening on Twitter though. Those of us in Japan and able to understand Japanese noticed a stark contrast between the relatively calm Japanese media and foreign press. We began translating live press conferences of the Chief Cabinet Secretary and linking to official radiation readings posted by Tokyo Electric Power Company. People with an understanding of nuclear radiation pitched in and started fleshing out our knowledge on the subject and others went into the stricken areas to volunteer at the shelters. A team of citizen journalists had assembled and were disseminating information that was not only factually correct, but balanced and peer-reviewed. A far cry from the exaggerated coverage by many professional journalists and in some cases, reporting that bordered on the unethical.”

I disagree with the last sentence, however. Most of the Finnish reporting that I saw during the first week following the catastrophe wasn’t even borderline unethical. Or journalism. There was a line in the sand somewhere, but they couldn’t even see the sand. Reporting professionals had moved out of the sand and gone into another region altogether.

Why not have a séance? Why not go mad?

I was able to identify myself with all of the actions mentioned above, from translating live press conferences to moving south due to company pressure. This was particularly important to me at a time where I’m beginning to doubt myself over my own attitudes vis-à-vis being scared shitless. After reading this article in the Yomiuri Online, it seems clear that being paranoid is the popular way to go:

“…Because of all this, I am now seeing patients visit my consultation room saying they are worried about radiation.

One said, “No matter how much I wash my hands, I can’t shake the worry that they might be tainted with radioactive substances.”

“I felt nauseated after drinking tea made with tap water,” another said.

In one extreme case, a person had been refraining from deep breathing out of fear of inhaling radiation, and they panicked after feeling a pain in their chest.”

Maybe those people aren’t wrong after all. Maybe I should forget everything I know and get frightened of everything for no rational reason whatsoever. I don’t think I could, though. There’s something wrong with my brain. I am utterly unable to make the connection between something that is not happening and what it might not cause in the future. If you stop breathing now because of the fear of radiation, you will most likely die sooner from the lack of oxygen than you would from thyroid cancer later on in life. Then again, if you follow Fox News, you might as well think that Fukushima is in downtown Utah. Parodia on mahdotonta, koska he tekevät sen itse.

But to mirror and expand the feelings of both writers quoted above, I think it is ludicrously selfish of people who are fine to project their paranoia around at a moment where actual people are in real peril. There is a difference between being worried about your family who was possibly swept away in a tsunami three weeks prior and being far from the epicenter, in perfect health, worried about a potentially large number of some radioactive unit you heard on the news and could not possibly comprehend.

On a lighter note, the situation in Nakamurabashi is becoming dire. Granted, chashuu was 30% off, but the supermarket at the station had now run out of both natto and beer. I long for the comfort of the grave.

-Antti

Senya Ichiya

Posted by on April 1, 2011 No comments

17 nights. Never before in my life have I spent 17 nights in a row at the same hotel, but I guess there’s a first time for everything. I have to admit that towards the end the sojourn began taking a toll on me as the environment was not really designed for the creation of anything meaningful. Luckily, those days are now over and I am finally returning to Tokyo to assess damages, empty my trash cans that have probably become alive during my absence and eventually resume work as usual.

The Bard’s Song

I was recently relayed the list of final changes I have to make to my thesis before I can get it printed. The list was substantial and overwhelmed me in such a way that instead of tackling the issue I opted to spend the following couple of days protecting the Sword Coast from the Iron Throne.

Once I get back home, however, my diet will consist of finishing the thesis, writing a paper to get my final 3 credits, go to work, study Japanese and write more job applications. The order of importance may vary.

Tokyo Safety Disclaimer: I won’t drink tap water and I hired a guy with a Geiger counter to follow me wherever I go and help me make my saving throws against radiation with a modifier of +3. Looking at that last sentence, I get the feeling might have played slightly too much D&D during the past 24 hours. I will also try my hardest not to get stuck in an elevator when the blackouts strike. Or maybe the opposite. It could prove to be quite the introspective moment when stuck in an elevator alone for a couple of hours. I could become enlightened or… bored?

Just Communication

Thanks to long train trips and relentless queuing for muteppou, I’m really close to finishing reading the Love Hina series in Japanese. While the comic itself is a relatively repetitive and stereotypical love story about a hopeless purikura nerd and a tsundere, there is one peculiarity that really sticks out when following the events unfold in this day and time: Love Hina relies heavily on plot mechanics that imply that geographical separation equals complete loss of communication. Anyone reading this blog may now realize this is not the case, anymore.

The original comic was published between 1998-2001, as arguably one of the last contemporary stories that were able to realistically rely on the aforementioned equation, which was effectively destroyed within a few years by the increasing prevalence of mobile phones and online communication. I felt it was rather interesting thinking that in only 10 years, a common and plausible storytelling device became unusable due to its now ludicrous nature.

Not unrelated to the previous paragraphs, I am also looking for a new manga series that includes full furigana, so suggestions are very welcome.

-Antti

P.S. Just arrived in Nerima, everything is fine.

The Art of Thanking

Posted by on March 27, 2011 No comments

It’s always a difficult process to go into, but especially get out of stores in Japan, due to one particular, culture-linked reason. There exists a wide array of stark contrasts in Japan, some of which I have covered before in my tales. The one I’m going to introduce now concerns verbal communication in service situations. While there is very limited small talk occurring elsewhere, shopkeepers and other service personnel tend to talk constantly for no apparent reason, spouting polite slogans all the time, forever.

This communication is culturally inclined to only happen one way. They are supposed to make me feel welcome and satisfied, but I am not really supposed to answer or even acknowledge them. The aforementioned lack of action is extremely difficult for me. If a person thanks me or welcomes me, I get an irrepressible urge to retort. Judging from how natives handle these situations, the correct behavior appears to be limited to ignoring and, on a good day, dismissive grunts. I am miserably bad at doing that. Granted, I have the ability to fully ignore certain people I know. My friends are similarly adept at ignoring me; it’s the only thing that keeps us from killing each other. But I am horrendously ineffective at ignoring polite strangers. These boring paragraphs work as a premise to the following, equally irrelevant problem.

The oft-repeated irasshaimase notwithstanding, I still attempt to answer most “thank yous” and “goodbye, come agains” that are sent my way. The issue here is that Japanese people are required by law to have the final say in all things courteous. They need to be the last ones to bow or say thank you. To make matters more interesting, so do I. Many a time have I ended a restaurant or konbini trip in some kind of never-ending thanking duel, as if time had suddenly stopped in much the same way old VHS tapes behaved when put on pause: repetitive discrete motion and a hiss. The ultimate conclusion to these visits used to be that I was already well out of the shop before finally shutting up with the “azassss”, an infinitely shortened version of the standard arigatou gozaimasu.

I was also reminded of a story I read a long time ago about a foreigner wishing to leave a store without allowing the clerk to answer his final bow. After bowing what he had decided would be his winning performance, he dashed to his car and tried leaving the premises. To his surprise, the Japanese shopkeeper was waiting for him at the exit of the parking lot, and got his revenge.

My ingenious way to prevent this from happening nowadays is timing. I have been following a harsh regimen of arigatou training in order to place my thanks correctly in a real life situation. If I begin thanking at just the right moment, I will end the verbal portion of the exchange at the exact same instant as the adversary, thus relieving us both from answering duty and leading the non-argument to an end.

All of this came to mind because I made two trips to Saint Marc Café today. Two trips were necessary because I wanted to take photos of the pastries and forgot on the first try. Naturally I had to go there for a second time, only for the sake of the blog, and not at all because I wanted to eat more chocolate croissants. Weirdly enough, I forgot to take photos before going on a binge on the second visit as well. Instead, here is a picture of some stuff I ate at a café in Kobe roughly a week ago.

Train station lunch. The manly drink is strawberry milk, with ice. A straw was added later.

IT’S NOT FUNNY! DON’T TALK! THE HOT TUB’S TOO HOT!

In other news, for the second time this season, the sento of Hotel Chuo was too hot for a westerner to enter. I’m pretty sure the old Japanese men frequenting it have boiled themselves so badly they cant even feel anything anymore.

-Antti

Delusions of Grandeur

Posted by on March 24, 2011 No comments

It has proved quite interesting to follow the amount of traffic generation to the site before, during, and in the aftermath of the Tōhoku earthquake. While most of the hits are generated by my mom and the innumerable people she has forwarded my blog to, it’s still encouraging to see that I’m not paying for hosting only for the sake of draining my bank account.

Spikes

Not surprisingly, public interest in my life multiplied by 40 on the very day the earthquake hit. Then it dwindled for a couple of days until the nuclear scare got out of hand and traffic reached a record number that most likely won’t be surpassed until the first shots of World War III occur in my back yard. Potentially.

The World at Large

After seeing the huge influx in readership numbers during the earthquake crisis I’ve began to follow traffic charts slightly too much, forcing myself to write posts even when I haven’t really felt like it, just to see if I could artificially keep the numbers up. That strategy will now be revised as no matter how much I write, the stories are still aimed at people who at least know me, or are otherwise interested in stalking my life. This severely limits the amount of general traffic to the site, and I don’t really see any reason to change that. Writing about tourism tips is hardly appealing, and writing without inspiration is both taxing and results in lower quality output.

Although I would like to embrace Frank Herbert’s comment on inspiration and looking at my older texts I can agree with most of his views, I have a very difficult time putting words in the right order when I’m in lazy mode. I also recently realized that I usually only get an urge to write when I am bereft of outside distractions or otherwise deep in thought. Most frequently this inspirational time lapse occurs when wandering around aimlessly, getting incredibly frustrated with something or just before falling asleep. Rarely in these situations am I able to write things down on the spot. This dilemma often leads to the dismissal of a topic altogether or the creation of a watered down version later when I eventually reach the needed tools.

One of the things I really enjoy with writing, and life in general, are quotes. I tend to include them everywhere, much to the chagrin of people around me. Their amount varies strongly by post, but I am quasi-unable to publish any text within which I would not be able to accredit several words or expressions to specific people or situations. Some references are very direct and apparent, while others are taken out of context and surreptitiously hidden from those not concerned. In theory, at the very least. This is also something that I will not give up on, no matter how taxing it is for the reader.

Both my current and former blog contain a wide array of personal, historical, linguistic and pop culture references, which leads to a situation where the full extent and depth of posts can sometimes only be understood by people who enjoy similar hobbies as I do, are very close to me, or at worst (or best), only me. Different people can decipher different things within a post and may feel like missing some others. In the ideal circumstances, readers should be oblivious to not comprehending an obscure reference as they are not meant to notice it in the first place. Maybe some day I’ll be able to write about things that the public at large could care about, but now is not the time.

Enough of this pseudo-artistic nonsense.

I recently had a phone conversation with my boss. Due to random rolling blackouts and confusion in Tokyo, the office will remain closed until further notice. The main implication here is that I’m still stranded in Osaka until at least early next week. Today, I went to retrieve some KI pills from the honorary consulate general in Shinsaibashi and explained that they weren’t really for me to use, but rather work as a placebo to lower my dad’s blood pressure some 8000 kilometers to the West. He agreed that it was an acceptable reason and gave me a 5-day supply of emergency iodine to fill my thyroid with just for kicks.

Days in Osaka keep following the same general pattern, except I managed to catch a cold now, which makes everything so fucking much more enjoyable.

-Antti

P.S. Nyt on hyvä aika alkaa seurata kaikkien aikojen oudointa Jukola-suunnistusporukkaa johon itsekin kuulun (ainakin nimellisesti). Fanittamaan pääsee osoitteessa http://www.facebook.com/teamheiaheia ja blogia voi seurata osoitteessa http://heiaheia.larksnest.org. Samalla asiaan vihkiytymättömien kannattaa liittyä heiaheia.comiin ja alkaa pitää kirjaa liikuntasuorituksistaan sekä kannustaa muita tuttujaan verkossa. Lisään edellämainitut linkit myös sivupalkkiin kaikkien iloksi.

Quarter of a Century

Posted by on March 21, 2011 2 comments

As Monday was one of Ryan’s few days off, I had decided to tag along and join his merry group of friends in Kobe instead of spending one more repetitive day in Osaka. After meeting Ryan at the Sannomiya station around noon, several NPCs joined our party. In order of appearance:

Nick – Kiwi English teacher

Kaya – Japanese travel agent

Atsushi – Japanese post office worker

Keiko – Japanese nurse

Later on, Ryan’s fiancée Sayumi also teamed up with us us for what ended up being a day worth remembering. In the early afternoon Atsushi and Keiko took us to the café of hotel Piena, which was renowned for its homemade jam, a specialty used in outrageously innovative ways: adding jam in coffee to create… *drumroll* jam coffee. The place was viciously overpriced, with jam coffee costing ¥680 and the pastries hovering around ¥500. Coffee and apricot jam did not mix particularly well, either. However, the cozy café proved to be a very efficient chatting venue for the couple of hours we spent there.

No jam!

Meeting Japanese people without Basti also resulted in a cleansing and confidence-building experience. Suddenly, I was no longer the retard that could not speak Japanese properly but instead became a respected part of the community. In fact, the Japanese might have gotten slightly too excited at my projected level of Japanese considering 75% of it is bluff and the rest is made of anime quotes. Atsushi in particular provided me with a couple of generous references I’m eager to include in my future résumés:

-Your humor… very high level.

-I respect

-Smart cool guy.

I was also suggested a career as a manzai comedian.

Yopparai

Although Atsushi doesn’t drink and Ryan had warned me that he will most likely not be joining us later for the izakaya, we eventually managed to persuade him anyway. The local Torikizoku had been located earlier just in case the situation later needed it, which it did. Thus, the evening soon carried on with the standard prescription of tanrei, edamame, cabbage, chicken heart, nankotsu, kara-age, pickled eggplant, toriheiyaki, torikamameshi, chikin nanban and camembert korokke. I am not going to explain any of those terms, except cabbage. It’s cabbage.

Atsushi and I talked lengthily about topics like Finnish summer, midnight sun, auroras, Fukushima, Japanese politics as well as English and Japanese studies. The discussion was executed with a peculiar combination of English and Japanese, with each of us speaking the language we were able to least communicate with. 勉強になるな.

We left Toriki around 8, earlier than ever before. On the way to the station we passed through a narrow street with an uncanny resemblance to Sector 7 slums. I failed to take any pictures worth publishing, though. With the exception of Sayumi, the Japanese coalition headed home at this point while the rest of us resumed drinking at Ryan’s place, emptying bottles of shochu that his radiophobic ex-colleague had left behind before escaping the country a week prior. Eventually, we accompanied Nick and Sayumi to the station so they could catch the last train back to Osaka before attempting to watch an episode of Dennou Coil and passing out on the floor.

-Antti

8-bit Trip

Posted by on March 20, 2011 2 comments

I can no longer deny that my lengthened tenure in Osaka is becoming slightly boring. I have a very limited amount of acquaintances in the area, no money to spend on extravangances and a constant doubt concerning my future in the country. Nevertheless, today was a day well spent reminiscing and visiting places of old.

Maantie on kiva kävellä

The day began as usual, going to the front desk before check out time to inquire about the possibility of keeping the same room for one additional day. I wonder if they are getting tired of my living strategy. They first moved me from the second and fifth floor to the eighth, and the amount of money I have to pay daily seems completely arbitrary. The first two days were ¥2300 each, the third and fourth were ¥2200, the fifth was ¥2400 because it was “high season” and the sixth was ¥2250. I am eager to find out what it will cost tomorrow. I eventually managed to keep the same room, grabbed a free coffee and went back to the eighth to plan my Hirakata itinerary properly. With no bike available and a couple of legendary spots deserving a visit, the trip would end up totaling about 10kms on foot.

Just getting to Kyobashi and jumping on the Keihan line after two years sent a tingling feeling to my nostalgia sensors. In Hirakata, seemingly nothing had changed. Toriki and Ring were at their respective spots, and so was the Gaidai itself. In retrospect, trying to visit the university on a Sunday may have been a bad idea. What made it worse is that the goddamn graduation ceremony and huge event with free food had been the day before but I hadn’t done my research beforehand and instead had to leave the premises baffled by my own stupidity.

What do your elf-eyes see?

White Horse

The first location having ended as a major failure, I needed something to lift my spirits. In addition, I hadn’t eaten breakfast yet, and it was past noon. If any members of the honorable Stamina Ramen Alliance are reading this, they should know where I was heading by now. It had to be the longest walk I’ve ever done for a bowl of noodles but there was no way I was passing on the opportunity. Due to the uniqueness of the event and the fact that I was starved by the point I arrived, I had to go all in. Watch and weep.

Unfortunately I couldn't bring myself to order both the Shiawase and the Stamina

Main course with extra toppings

Saido menyuu

Proof of Deed

懐かしい

The moseying from Hakuba Douji Ramen to the Kansai Gaidai International Seminar Houses was, although inevitable, also a very needed half-hour to descend back to earth. I was relatively confident that the Seminar Houses would be “open” even on a Sunday, and if the Otoo-san or Okaa-san at number 3 remembered be, I would have a slight (1% at most) chance to actually get in. I stopped on the way at Sanko supermarket because it was within the scope of the day’s mission and also to get a drink after finishing a notorious bowl of spices, salt and fat. Surprisingly, all previously mentioned variables were in my favor. SH 3 was open, Otoo-san was at the counter, remembered my face and agreed to let me see our good old lounge again. As per the Sacred Seminar House Rules of Inconvenience the whole first floor, the place with the best access, had been emptied of tenants. We also briefly discussed the exodus of foreign students caused by the general media panic as well as the ambient barometric pressure.

Penitentiary entrance

I later bumped into Prof. Tracy in the park but he was busy chatting about shaving cream on the phone and rushing to the bus so I eventually gave up talking to him and resumed my walk back towards the station. Few things are more depressing than walking past all the entertainment venues you frequented for a whole year and having nobody left to enjoy them with; karaoke is of limited fun alone no matter how many times you play Moskau.

-Antti